A Trip To St. Augustine

Julie was staying in St. Augustine for a few days and she wanted to see if a bunch of us wanted to take a road trip up there from Orlando and hang out on a Sunday afternoon. We were able to get a pretty good sized group to go at a somewhat short notice AND THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED.....






Me and Christian are excited to leave Orlando while Stacy is not convinced....YET!






We arrived at the Clarion Collection Hotel where Ms. Campbell was staying and we all felt like we needed to act like mature professionals.






Julie properly greeted Stacy at the door.....






.....while I properly greeted the bed!






Stacy found a map so she automatically became the leader and tagged along because she didn't want no trouble!






I, on the other hand, am always looking for trouble so I told Michael Jordan, "you ain't got game no mo'!"






Then Julie followed MY lead and started up some trouble with a fake pirate FIGHTIN' IRISH STYLE!






We didn't want to over do it with photographs of the fake plastic people outside of the stores, so we took a quick hootin nanny break.....






.....and by quick I mean one hour.






Christian Knightly and some wannabe Knightly fan waited patiently for the quick hootin nanny to come to an end.






"ARRRGGG...thar be treasure in this here chest."






"AHOY!!! It be the International Pirate flag. You best be saluting it right away unless you want to spend the rest of yer days in a watery grave!"






The toy octopus couldn't stand my lame pirate impersonation so he had to shut me up.






I was furious and grew five stories high!






But Stacy didn't care about me and my anger because she found a cat store off to the right.....






.....and it was upstairs.....






.....AND THEY WERE OPEN!!!






I was quick to shut up and not say a word so Stacy would not learn anymore about the male gender.






Then I found this droopy lil' fellow who was feeling down because it had a tag pierced to it's ear, so I tried my best to cheer it up by telling the grand tale of how I told Michael Jordan he ain't got game no mo'.






Julie finds it humorous when she sees a decapitated cat sporting trendy shades.






Christian was very careful in the kitchen area since this cat has the high ground.






I was also careful because I didn't want this mouse to know I had the high ground either.....






.....and so I seized the moment and took advantage of my ground.






To celebrate my victorious battle against that fake mouse we went to the hat store to try on all kinds of head gear.....even the fruity kind.






That's right...the fruity kind.






The fruity hats looked better on the girls.....






.....so I went back to my pirate impersonation because it's so awesome and is not over the top by any means.






Christian could totally pass as an Aussie.






I might be able to pass as an Aussie if I would only reveal one eye.






Then Christian had me beat on this one...there's no way i can follow this!






Julie shows off her cowgirl spirit.






While Stacy prepares for a sand storm to blow through the store.






Christian calmed Stacy down and assured everyone that the safety of the hat store customers was the utmost importance overall and that there was no sand storm coming at this time.






After the hat store was destroyed by the sand storm Julie ventured off and found an old fort.






At first I was a little skeptical and didn't believe this was a fort.....






.....but then we found a bunch of canons, which gave me reason to believe that this was indeed a fort because everyone knows canons on land are only in forts and canons in boats are pirate ships.






Christian and I discovered that canons are lousy teeter-totters.






But they work pretty well for nice pictures like this.






Or crazy pictures like this!






I was curious to know if this thing was still loaded after all these years.






Christian made me find out the hard way.






While I was unconscious from the canon ball striking me at full force, Stacy began to tell a story and I can only assume she was venting about my terrible pirate impersonation to Julie and Christian.






Julie, Christian and Stacy find a good set of stairs to practice their modeling audition for The Gap as they continue to wait for me after the blow to the stomach by a canon ball.






I may have a different opinion about the fort from winded experience, but everyone else gives it two thumbs up!






After all the excitement over at the fort Christian had to sit down for a moment and then blended in with his surroundings.






I was finally back up on my feet and it was good timing too because Ray and Melissa showed up for the fun! But before any of the fun starts Ray and I had to get down to business and take at least one picture of our big mouths just so we can get it out of the way and not worry about that later.






Ray asked me what we should do first to which I exclaimed, "I know...lets go play with the canons!"






We all went to a pizza joint and stuffed our faces with Italian pies.






Ray was trying to feed me a piece of Italian pie and I couldn't stop laughing and picking my nose simultaneously.






I was only laughing at this point so we were almost ready to do this.






Mission accomplished.






Ray ended up feeding me too much and the whole gang had to roll me out.






I deflated after about fifteen minutes, which I think is a record time for me after being rolled out of any restaurant.






And now it's time to figure out what the heck to do next.






Christian started telling a story to Julie, which again I can only assume he was talking behind my back about my pirate impersonation.






Ray spotted some delicious candy apples, but we didn't have time to roll another person out of a store so we got him to move along.






We totally own the streets of St. Augustine.....even if people were leaving to get out of the rain and that all of the shops were closing. WE STILL OWN THE STREETS!!!







Julie really needs to stop laughing when I make announcements about owning the streets. Nobody is going to take us seriously and for once in my life I would just like to own one street.






We were about to head over to the beach but before we did I wanted to take a Snoopy-style power nap on a canon.






And Stacy enjoyed the one moment where she was taller than me. She was just lucky I didn't get angry and grew as tall as a lighthouse!






We made it to the beach and Ray immediately started doing his impression of Fonzie from Happy Days. Stacy would have rather seen me do my horrible pirate impression instead, but Melissa was captivated by Ray's nostalgic takeoff.






Stacy knew the only way to bring Ray out of this travesty was to show him a frisbee with glow sticks taped on the bottom.






I took the frisbee from Stacy and played around with it for a while.....






.....which made Ray loose focus on our beach toy and he began to do an impersonation of classic movie monsters.






Then we discovered that if we taped the glow sticks on to Ray he would become his normal self again without the impersonations that Stacy loves so much.






Christian ripped off one of the glow sticks from Ray's shirt just to be funny, but Stacy did not find this amusing at all.....






......so it was a fight to the death!






While Christian and Stacy were trying to settle their differences like adults me and Julie found the ocean.






We all decided to walk along the ocean for a while and tried our best to have fun.






We made it back to Julie's fancy hotel somehow and it was about that time for the rest of us to head back down to Orlando.






So we all said our good-byes while I began to abnormally grow tall for the last time.






"See you all later. Thanks for coming to visit...NOW GET OUT OR I'M CALLING SECURITY!!!"