Top Secret Comic Book

As I arrived home one late evening I noticed a large envelope in the kitchen that was addressed to me. It was from my friends Chris and Leah Karner, so I knew this was going to be good! I carefully pulled out the package, which was protected from a piece of cereal box inside and labeled in permanent marker "Top Secret." I quickly found a safe and secure area to view the classified documents that were kept within the well-built container. It appeared at first to just be an ordinary comic book featuring a few of the world's most beloved Marvel characters, but as I opened this classified paperback I discovered something unusual. This comic book was about ME!

It seemed to me that I should keep this illustrated article under wraps (I'm 100% positive this is why Chris and Leah sent it to me), but since I really don't care about revealing personal or unofficial details relating to myself I figured I would just post this entire item as a blog. If I mysteriously vanish anytime soon then the Feds have probably apprehended me due to the unauthorized clearance of displaying the documentation below. But this is a risk I am willing to take considering that this story made me laugh so hard I had tears in my eyes while reading a few parts, and I can't keep all of this hilarity to myself by any means.

In case you are wondering who are Chris and Leah Karner then please let me explain. Chris and I were once college roommates several years ago and since then he has been one of the funniest people I know. Chris met Leah a few years later and then they got married in Clearwater, Florida. I met Leah during the weekend of their wedding and since then Chris and Leah have been the funniest married couple I know. Now that all of this is cleared up please enjoy the comic book gift Chris and Leah sent to me.